Wednesday, 29 August 2012

Wednesday Witter #8 : the pink rabbit that was

When DDs 1 and 2 were small I regularly went through their stuff and gave to charity any toy that they had outgrown, didn't play with anymore or had never played with. That was the only way I could more or less keep on top of the mess.
These days I unfortunately don't do it often enough and I definitely can't keep on top of the mess. It would actually be more necessary than ever to declutter, the family having grown to 6 members and still living in a terraced, small victorian 3 beds cottage.

Anyway I used to do it and I was generally lucky in my choices, nothing got missed... until the fateful day when DD1 was about 5 and I gave away a very big, very pink soft toy rabbit that belonged to her and that she never played with anymore, only to discover that she actually LOVED it. It hit me during a parent-teacher evening at her school. She had written in her literacy exercise book that she was sad because she had lost her pink rabbit...

I felt wretched, drowned in guilt. I had caused her to be so sad that, at only 5, she had written about it!
I began a frantic search for the rabbit on ebay. I had given it via a collection bag so no hope to retrieve it from the charity shop. For weeks, months, I looked at hundred of posts for soft toys rabbits but not one looked close enough to the 'real' one for me. DH kept telling me that she would forget but she kept talking about it from time to time. Eventually I stopped looking and hoped she would indeed forget. By the way, I hadn't told her it was definitively gone, officially it was only 'lost'.

The time flew by as it does. DD1 still mentionned the pink rabbit occasionally and I would go onto ebay again. Suddenly my little girl was 9 and... still thinking about her rabbit (oh, the guilt for me!). I started looking again, not finding but thinking "I can barely remember what it exactely looked like. Will she?" Finally I found one that looked fairly like it and bought it. I put it on her bed and waited with bated breath.

She loved it. She did think it was the one from when she was small and she's really happy. At least she's happy although I'm still ridden with guilt. Of course I know - now - that I should have told her the truth from the beginning, as hard as it was, it would have been better, wouldn't it?
What do you think? Are you appaled or do you understand?!

PS: I shall have to delete this post one day, before she reads it!

5 comments:

  1. What a great story. I'm so glad she loves the new one and do hope your guilt has abated slightly!

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    1. She's so much like me. I can still remember the feeling of loss from a couple of toys my parents made me give away! But yes, she is happy. The pink rabbit doesn't leave her bed now :)

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  2. There used to be a website reuniting lost toys with their owners....I wonder if it still exists? Your story reminded me of it. I would have done the same with the rabbit - but I doubt whether I would have been such a dedicated mum to trawl ebay all these years.

    Sometimes honesty is not the best policy...it clears one conscience and clouds another.

    x

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    1. Thank you for that kind comment Sarah. You're so right about clearing one conscience and clouding another. Choices are so difficult sometimes, aren't they?

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  3. Aw, what a lovely story! The simplest, easiest, and yes possibly wisest (with hindsight) solution might have been to be honest in the beginning. BUT...I think I'd have done the same, too. :-)

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